Over the past week or so New Orleans Hornets fans have been getting restless at the sight of no Emeka Okafor in the starting lineup. After suffering an abdominal injury the big-man’s presence has been lacking and the team has in turn gone on a sour losing streak. At the beginning of the season it seemed a mildly humorous thought that we’d all be this worried, but that’s just what an improvement and impact he has made this season.
So in order to light up the voodoo amongst our fan-base I thought we should undertake the following, non-religious (of course) rituals to help persuade whoever it may be to get Emeka back on the court fully fit and healthy.
1. Do the Bart Man
In an episode of the Simpsons Bart gains special healing powers, we should “Tesify!”
2. Eat more protein
Eating more protein helps repair muscle tissue quicker, so along with Emeka (who’s bound to be eating a bit more protein) let’s do the same.
3. Do 50 sit-ups and 50 crunches
Make the most of your abs, or if you don’t have any prepare yourselves some.
4. Do Yoga Exercises in respect to the Oak Tree
There is a reason the dude played 306 consecutive games, so let’s all dabble in some of his yoga just to help the basketball gods shine some light on him and the team.
So folks, do these for things a long with buying an Emeka Okafor bobble head, just because they are awesome.
N.B. All actions must be undertaken with Emeka Voodoo doll or will not work otherwise.