Tale of the Tape: David West vs. Kevin Garnett, Steel Cage Match Edition

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The Hornets had a day off yesterday but David West was doing work. The Hornets leading scorer may be out for the season, but his second career as a professional NBA-player fighter is still going strong. Last night, Don King flew Kevin Garnett down to New Orleans to take on West in a STEEL CAGE MATCH.

The ways to win are simple: pinfall, submission, or by escaping the cage and having both feet touch the floor.

Vitals

David West: 30 years of age, stands 6’ 9”, weighs 240 pounds.

Kevin Garnett: 34 years of age, listed at 6′ 11″ (but stands around 7′) weighs 253.

Pre-fight

Don King explains the reason both players (fighters) agreed to a cage match, “Kevin wanted to go with a no-holds-barred match. He wanted to be able to freely go for West’s eyes, face and…ummm…below the belt. He felt a match with no disqualifications would fit his fighting style better. So to compromise David agreed to the steel cage to add a degree of ferocity to the match.”

More after the jump…

Our announcers, Jeff Van Gundy and Marv Alberts, think this match has a lot of potential. “In theory, you have two intense competitors who will be fighting to the death,” says Van Gundy.

“Actually, no one is fighting to the death,” Alberts replies.

“Then I have no idea what I’m talking about,” and Van Gundy shuts up for the rest of the evening.

“What my partner meant to say is that we have too fiercely competitive fighters here tonight. And knowing the intensity of both, we should have a very compelling match on our hands tonight.”

The lights dim and and the cage is lowered to the ring.

Our guest referee, the Nature Boy Ric Flair, walks to the ring, opens the door to the cage and enters.

All of a sudden, the arena goes dark. Everything is blanketed in darkness for nearly a minute. When the lights come back on Kevin Garnett is in the ring. When asked about his entrance after the match Garnett said, “It’s an intimidation move. What’s scarier than pure blackness? Sharks? Bats? Nothing is darker than blackness.”

The arena lights dim again. “Cowboys from Hell” by Pantera starts playing, Fireworks shoot up and David West, with a towel over his head, walks up and enters the cage. His face is fixated in a scowl. Blackness does not scare Mr. West.

West takes the towel off his head and throws it out the cage door. Before it gets that far, Garnett runs over and swats it down. Goaltending. Garnett walks back to his corner.

Ric Flair yells WOOOOOOOOO and our match is underway.

Both fighters head right to the center of the ring and start throwing punches. Garnett lands the first blows with hard rights to West’s stomach. He gains control over West and smashes his face right into the cage. Garnett pulls West back and clotheslines him right onto the ground. He then jumps up and smashes his legs on West’s chest.

“This could be a very long night for West,” Alberts says from his ringside seat. Van Gundy is silent.

West recovers and Garnett walks towards him. Just as Garnett tries to grab him, West fires off a beautiful drop kick which sends Garnett to the mat. The crowd at the Hive screams, “WOOOOOOO!”

West walks over, picks up Garnett, throws him into the cage and connects with elbows to the back of Garnett’s head, mashing his face into the cage.

Before Garnett has time to recover, West climes up the ropes and stands at the top of the turnbuckle. He flies off and catches Garnett in the face with an strong elbow. Both players crash onto the mat. Garnett is now bleeding.

“Wow, who saw that coming?” Alberts screams. “West’s knee looks okay so far. Good news for the Hornets next year.”

West scrambles over to the sprawled out Garnett and covers him up. Ric Flair jumps on the ground. ONE. TWO. But before Flair’s hand hits the mat for the third time, Garnett kicks out of the pin.

Garnett stands up and delivers a vicious kick to West’s side. He runs behind West and attempts a choke hold which West fights off. Undaunted and on the offensive, Garnett grabs West, picks him up and delivers a hard suplex. West is sprawled out on the mat. Garnett goes for the pin. ONE. But West kicks out.

West gets up and charges Garnett with his fists flying. West lands two huge haymakers and Garnett stumbles back into a corner. West runs up and delivers a flying kick to Garnett’s head.

“Garnett looks done after that. What a strong finish by West,” Alberts says.

West grabs Garnett by the head and throws him onto the mat. West climbs the top ropes. He waves his arms at the crowd. The place erupts with noise. West jumps, sticks elbows and lands on Garnett’s head.

“Did we just see Macho Man Randy Savage’s finishing move right there?” Alberts yells.

West rolls up Garnett for the pin and Flair drops to the ground to count it out. ONE. TWO. THREE. And it’s over. West open the door to the cage.

Before he walks out, he looks behind at a broken Kevin Garnett. “And One,” West yells.