Ranking New Orleans Pelicans player name anagrams

New Orleans Pelicans (Photo by Layne Murdoch/NBAE via Getty Images)
New Orleans Pelicans (Photo by Layne Murdoch/NBAE via Getty Images) /
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Every so often, it’s good to stop and have a little bit of fun. So, let’s rank the best New Orleans Pelicans player name anagrams.

For basketball supposedly being a fun game, there sure is a bunch of drama we have to deal with every single season. Clearly, this year has been even more hectic than usual for the New Orleans Pelicans and their fans, so why not take a quick break from the monotony of the seriousness?

Below you’ll find the definitive rankings of the best anagrams we could come up with for each player on the New Orleans Pelicans roster. If you’re unaware, an anagram is when you rearrange the letters of a word to spell something else. For example, “Astronomer” can be rearranged into “Moon Starer.”

Without further ado, let’s do this.

16. Solomon Hill = No Shill Loom

Solomon Hill is a very serious weaver in his free time (probably), and he’s not about to use any loom but the best. This one is bad, sorry. They get better.

15. Darius Miller = A Sillier Drum

Picture the silliest drum you can think of. Double the silliness. Double it again. There, now we’re talking.

14. Jahlil Okafor = “Hark, jail fool!”

A prisoner in Shakespearean times yelling at his guard to get his attention.

13. Julius Randle = Injured All Us

Hopefully not foreshadowing…

12. Kenrich Williams = Mini-Krill Cashew

The new flavor of Planter’s cashews seasoned with those little shrimp dudes that whales eat. Tasty.

11. Jason Smith = Sham’s Joint

When Shams Charania retires from breaking NBA news on Twitter, he wants to open a quick-service restaurant called this.

10. Frank Jackson = Snack Fork Jan

We all have an Aunt Jan that brings her own forks to every family function, right?

9. E’Twuan Moore = “Ow, enema tour.”

…yikes.

8. Anthony Davis = “Son had vanity.”

This was too easy.

7. Jrue Holiday = Hula Joyride

Offered at many all-inclusive resorts in Hawaii, a Hula Joyride is when you take a catamaran to a private beach while wearing a grass skirt.

6. Cheick Diallo = Kale Cod Chili

Has potential.

5. Dairis Bertans = Disaster Brain

What my teachers called me in high school.

4. Elfrid Payton = Nifty Leopard

This is actually a cool nickname. Let’s get this one to stick.

3. Stanley Johnson = Johnny Snot Ales

A hipster beer company that’s going out of business and can’t figure out why.

2. Trevon Bluiett = Violent Butter

I call dibs on this for my new band name.

1. Ian Clark = Anal Rick

He just is really weird about things always being clean. Distant cousin to Pickle Rick.

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So, there you have it. All 16 New Orleans Pelicans player name anagrams ranked. Think of any better ones? Send them my way on Twitter at @KriegerSports. Now, back to your regularly scheduled NBA drama.