A Definitive Ranking of the New Orleans Pelicans as Dodgeball Players

Feb 10, 2014; Toronto, Ontario, CAN; New Orleans Pelicans players huddle before the start of their game against the Toronto Raptors at Air Canada Centre. The Raptors beat the Pelicans 108-101. Mandatory Credit: Tom Szczerbowski-USA TODAY Sports

August is a slow month for not just the NBA but for just about every sport. NFL is just opening up preseason action, MLB is in the latter stages of their incredibly long season and I’m not sure what the NHL is doing right now honestly. What that leads to is fun projects like CBS’s dodgeball draft that was released today. The one thing I noticed and questioned on Twitter was the lack of New Orleans Pelicans star Anthony Davis, which as I learned came down to his size.

As it turns out though dodgeball is something that gets people on Twitter talking a fair amount and because of it led to the following tweet to me from Jake Madison.

While initially I felt that Jake was right, upon further thought I realized that it isn’t as clear-cut as it first seems as the Pelicans roster actually has perhaps the only person in the league that can come close to Asik’s dodgeball uselessness.

What that eventually led to was my attempt at trying to rank every member of the Pelicans roster in their ability to play dodgeball which turned out way harder than I expected it too.

Before getting into the actual list of players some things need to be clarified.

As I learned by reading the post on CBS and through my interactions on Twitter a few things are very important in dodgeball.

First is size, Anthony Davis turned out to not be a very popular choice due to his incredible size which many felt would be a problem due how much room it would leave to hit him.

Second is the ability to catch the ball. As is the case in official dodgeball, when a thrown ball is caught, the person who threw it is out and the team that caught the ball gets to bring an eliminated player back on the court.

Finally, throwing power was third but considering how little we know about how hard any of the Pelicans can throw a ball this is one that wasn’t really taken into account for these rankings.

So without further ado we move on to the Pelican that would be worst at dodgeball.

Next: The worst